I’ll be doing a new theme on this blog: relationship(s) and adult ADHD. My aim of this blog still is to give a reflection of my life, me and my ADHD. You could say it’s an ADHD ‘lifestyle’ blog but what bothers me is that a lifestyle is something that you choose. ADHD is not something I chose, it’s just the way I’m wired. If 90% of the people were wired that way, this blog would have no reason to exist as it is. But given the fact that 95-99% of people are NOT wired this way, it makes things a bit more, er, interesting. I enjoy writing, and I hope people enjoy reading. I even have a small bit of hope that it can mean a bit more sometimes.
As you all know, I’m in a long term relationship with Mr Tall, Dark and Handsome, aka TDH. Things are going well between us. Really well. He’s my pull and I’m his push, except early in the morning when I can not be moved in any direction at all. We love each other.
We will be moving in together. A massive step.
He must be nuts to want to live with me. Seriously. This blog isn’t called ‘A Devastatingly Heavenly Darling’ for nothing.
This is going to be a very exciting time, possibly somewhat trying every now and again.
A period in which I think we both will learn a lot, about each other, about ourselves, about simply making it work.
We’re not going into this as a ‘test run’ to ‘see if it works out’. We’re committed to each other, and we’re both motivated to see how it works out. Look, every relationship may fail, even after many years. The plan is not to let it fail, the plan is to let it work and to have an amazing life together. We are figuring out how to do that. So far, so good.
We’re both new to this, but so far we’ve learned that it’s important to keep communicating… and as Kelly Flaningan points out in his Marriage Manifesto, it’s not about our own selfish needs. It’s about us, it’s about loving the other. It’s about, you know, being a couple.
I’m a big girl, I can take care of myself. I can live without TDH.
But I don’t want to. I want to be with him.
He makes me so much better, he says I do the same to him. Life is just so much better when we’re together. Even if it’s not always like that.
I mean, he still won’t let me paint every room a different colour… and I still won’t let him hang his ‘portal’ canvas in the living room. (No, darling, REALLY…)